Love How It Hurts
by HedgieX
Summary: Erin's handed in her resignation, but isn't sure if it's what she and Rosie actually want or need. Dimitri tries to comfort her, but she's reluctant about that too – has she been hurt in a previous relationship? Maybe eventual romance...who knows?
1. Spider in the Cracks

_**For**____**Gem6**____**:)**_

_**1**__** – **__**Spider**____**in**____**the**____**Cracks**_

"How's Rosie?"

Dimitri seemed to be asking that a lot. Whenever he talked to Erin, it seemed to be the first question asked – probably because it was the easiest.

"She's okay. Thanks."

They were up on the roof again, shivering in the bitter breeze. A strand of Erin's fringe fell down across her face as cascading waves of chocolaty hair rippled in the air. She flicked it away.

"That's good."

"Yeah."

Dimitri always had so much to say, in theory, but once he actually got there he couldn't remember anything. All he saw was her eyes; their stunning warmth, and the way they twinkled in the weak sunlight.

"And how are you?"

She didn't reply straight away this time – she just gave a half-hearted shrug. He nodded patiently as she took a deep breath. "I guess Harry's told you about my resignation, then."

"He...yeah."

Silence again.

"I'm sorry, Dee. I wanted to tell you, before...well, before my name was the one echoing around the walls of Thames House," she smiled feebly, and his heart leapt against his ribs, "I know I haven't been here long, and I know what everyone's saying about me, but I can't do it any more. Rosie...Rosie always has to come first. If I can't have both, I have to have my family."

"No one's saying anything. They understand."

Another smile, but a slightly sad smile this time, "Not everyone is as understanding as you are."

Dimitri shrugged. Erin turned to gaze out over London, over the Houses of Parliament, and the London Eye, and everything that made her home. She didn't know what she wanted, in truth. She didn't know if she was leaving because she _wanted_to be with her daughter, or because she _had_ to be with her. Did it really matter any more?

"It'll be okay."

She didn't look at him, "Yeah."

He sighed. He had to say something now, or he'd never find another chance. You never knew when things would be over forever – you had to leap before they disappeared. "When are you leaving?"

"I told Harry I'd work my notice – he can't really afford to lose anyone whilst we're in the middle of the deal, especially after...after Tariq," she whispered the last words, as if scared of waking the dead, "Probably the end of the week."

"With Ruth gone as well..." Dimitri paused, wrinkling his nose, "They're going to have to steal someone from six. I might kill Calum if we don't have someone else quickly."

"Oh, he's alright, really. Just an acquired taste."

They both laughed. The sound was hollow, ringing out over the city. Erin faced him again; he watched a solitary droplet trickle down her cheek, before she swiped it away. She licked her lips nervously.

He reached out and touched her shoulder, "Erin..."

"I'm okay," she shook him off, trying to convince herself.

His hand hovered in mid air, "Really?"

She shrugged. Reached inside her pocket and pulled out a purse. Unclasped it, with trembling fingers, and held it out to her colleague. Her and Rosie, curled up in pyjamas, laughing. They looked happy; they looked totally blissful. He hadn't seen that at all.

"I have to do this, Dimitri. I can't risk losing the only person in the world I love unconditionally. The only person in the world who truly loves me back."

"You also said she was the only one you'd ever lied to... And that wasn't true..."

She stared at him again, "Look, I know you're only trying to help, and I'm grateful, but you're not making it any easier."

His hand dropped down to his side again now, as she flushed guiltily. She focused on the floor, watching a spider dart from crack to crack. It wasn't good at disguise – any predator would've caught it easily. Wasn't she like that? With a small daughter, she was destructible. Her life could be ruined in a couple of easy steps. And they would know that – she'd always be targeted.

"No. I know. I'm sorry," Dimitri blushed too, embarrassed. She was far too good for him anyway – had always been far too good for him. "I've got work to do anyway, I'll see you later."

"No, Dimitri," it was her turn to touch him, to grab his arm. He turned back, and their eyes locked again. Hers were tearful and pleading, his regretful and cautious. She always did this – always upset the only people who at least seemed like they cared.

"Don't cry."

"Sorry," she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand weakly.

He paused, then reached up and ran a thumb under her eyes, smearing away the last of the dampness. Her skin was warm and soft. "You'll be okay. You'll both be okay. And Rosie...she'll be so proud of you, when she's older. She already is."

"She was rather taken with you, actually," Erin sniffed.

He laughed half-heartedly, "Knight in shining armour. Who wouldn't be?"

"I'm taking her swimming, on Sunday. I don't know...well, it's hardly very conventional, or very...if you'd like to come, you'd be very welcome."

"Are you_good_ swimmers?"

Erin smirked, "Rosie's brilliant. I...I prefer to take a poolside seat and cheer appropriately. And you?"

"I think I'm a little out of practice."

"We normally go for coffee afterwards. And juice, and cake. If you want to come, the offer's there."

They both smiled again, more genuinely this time, eyeing each other with a certain kind of interest. A certain kind of warmth.

"I'll be sure to consider it."

XxXxX


	2. Shallow End

**Thanks for the reviews :)**

_**2) ShallowEnd**_

Dimitri raised a hand to the bell on the door, his finger touching the plastic, yet not applying quite enough pressure to trigger the sound. Now he was here, he felt somewhat apprehensive.

"Dimmy!" Rosie squealed, flicking up the letterbox and peering out. Her eyes shone in the gloom of the flap. "Mummy, Dimmy's here!"

He straightened his t-shirt as the little girl disappeared again. Footsteps in the corridor; sharp and efficient taps as Erin's heels connected with the wooden floor. Dimitri glanced down at his worn trainers. How to make a guy feel inadequate, right?

The door swung open, "Hi."

"Oh...hi."

"You okay?"

He forced his head up and down, in a jerky nod, "Yeah. Are you? You look...you look nice."

"Thanks," she smiled. She didn't look shy, but she didn't look exactly very confident either. "I've just got to sort Rosie's bag out, I... Do you want to come in for a moment?"

Rosie emerged from the living room and reached out for his hand, "I did you a picture. Are you coming swimming with us?"

"Yeah, I..." he smiled as he was dragged over the threshold. Erin closed the door behind them, and disappeared upstairs silently.

"Here," Rosie lifted a piece of paper and held it out to him, "That's me, that's you, that's mummy."

"It's lovely, Rosie! Thank you," he ruffled her hair affectionately, his heart thudding again.

Both Erin and himself, with their square heads and stick arms, were holding Rosie's hands. Grins were plastered over all three faces. God, he didn't blame Erin for trying to protect her daughter. Their second meeting, and he already found himself adoring the child.

"Are you two ready?" Erin called from the hallway. Dimitri nodded, scooping up Rosie and following his boss out of the door. As she turned to lock it, he thought he caught a flash of extra makeup now highlighting Erin's eyes.

He couldn't be sure, though.

You never could be sure about these things.

XxXxX

"You're not...you're not coming swimming, then?" Dimitri faltered, seeing Erin slip out of the cubicle holding her daughter's goggles, still fully dressed.

"No, I thought...I don't feel too good. I'll give it a miss."

"Oh, okay," he narrowed his eyes; for such a brilliant liar normally, she wasn't doing a good job of convincing him today, "Are you alright? You do look a bit pale, actually."

"Mummy can't swim!" Rosie exclaimed, dropping Erin's hand and taking Dimitri's.

Erin's cheeks flooded with colour and she glanced around to see if anyone was near, "I...I..."

Dimitri held back a snort. After all, she did look scared. If it wasn't his presence (as if!) it was something else. Maybe she just needed a little convincing. "Well, that's alright. Like I said, I'm cr...I'm bad as well."

"She brought her arm bands," Rosie interjected helpfully, again.

"Rosie," Erin warned weakly.

He shrugged, "We could just sit in the shallow end?"

"You're ex-SBS."

"That was a while ago."

Erin half-smiled at the ridiculousness of the conversation, "And I still bet you could do a length twice as fast as anyone here."

He smiled too, "Hey, I'll look after you? What more could you want?"

She raised an eyebrow reluctantly, and slipped back into the cubicle. Rosie eyed the pool somewhat longingly whilst Dimitri did his best to be patient.

Erin reappeared eventually, her hair hastily scraped back into a ponytail, and her eyes pink where she'd wiped the mascara from them. "Happy now?"

He grinned, "Reasonably."

"You owe me."

"We'll see about that."

Rosie tugged at Dimitri's hand, "Can we go in now?"

"Come on, then," he let the girl lead him across to the water. She scampered down the stairs and ducked straight under, disrupting the stillness of the blue. Very confident. She'd grow up like her mother.

Erin hovered behind him as he followed Rosie down the steps. He submerged himself quickly, then raised his head and shook the droplets from his hair. "Coming in, then?"

She sat down on the side of the pool, dangling her feet down into the water so that her toes were just covered, "It's cold."

She had elegant feet, Dimitri thought. Elegant legs, elegant arms... Well, everyone got the picture. "Good job I know how to treat hypothermia, then."

"Funny," she mumbled, shivering. He gestured to the pool, and she slipped forward and into the water, throwing up splashes all around her. "It's freezing!"

"Shut up and swim."

"I thought you'd gathered from my daughter's revelation earlier," she rolled her eyes, "That I _can__not_ swim."

"Look, just relax, okay? Float, kick your legs, flap your arms."

She didn't shake his hand off her shoulder this time, but shook her head and attempted a smile instead, "I'm fine, I'll stay up here. Go on, go and play with her. I want to see how fast you can swim anyway."

"Okay," he sighed. Strong women. How he hated them.

Erin watched with a mixture of exasperation and admiration as he swum off, reaching the end of the pool before she could really process him swimming across it. He swum like a fish, or a mermaid. Sleek, and shining.

Dimitri swam a couple of lengths, then hoisted Rosie onto his back and swam a couple more, smiling as she squealed and clung on tight to his shoulder blades. He didn't look tired, but he stopped near the shallows, swung her from his back and splashed around with her instead. He gestured for Erin to join them.

She shook her head. She didn't know why, but she did. Maybe because she was jealous of the attention her daughter gave Dimitri, and of the obvious skill he had in the water. Maybe she was in awe of his charm and sweetness. Maybe she just wanted to watch them enjoy it for a while.

She felt nervous, yes, but she always did in the pool – she didn't like it. She didn't _hate_ it today; she didn't feel like a spy. She felt real – part of a real family.

That was good enough for one day.

XxXxX

**Okay so maybe gone off at a slight tangent, but bear with me, I'll do my best. Next chapter might contain a bit of a twist if I write what I think I might...**

**Oh and I think I forgot to mention all the disclaimer stuff on chapter one...we know who writes and acts for Spooks, and they're all amazing! And I'm not them.**

**_Love__How__it__Hurts_ is actually a song by _Scouting__For__Girls_ – listen to it; it's great xx**


	3. Giving us a Ride

_**I'm kind of flattered ;)**_  
><em><strong>Some of this was written last week, and the rest this morning as soon as I got up - thought I'd better get it up before THE END! Thanks to anyone who's read so far, or reviewed or favourited :)<br>A little angsty, but not for long! We'll all be in need of some fluff today xx**_

He saw her struggle, saw her flap her arms and emit a gurgle of bubbles. Time stood still. He reached out to help her, reached out to make sure she was okay. She'd already swum on, oblivious to his anxiety. He bit his lip, staying at the side for a moment, trying to calm down. This was why he hadn't had children, hadn't thought about children. Before he'd met Erin and Rosie.

"You!" a lifeguard bore down on him as he glanced up and registered a shadow, "Out of the pool!"

A couple of children nearby retreated, squealing and splashing. Nobody was sure if they were running from the voice or from the possibility of Dimitri. Dimitri shrunk back further against the wall, "Sorry?"

"You leave the children alone!"

"I...what? She's my...she's my friend's daughter," Dimitri glanced from Rosie, who was playing right down at the other end with another small child, to the lifeguard again, "I was checking she was okay."

"Oh, don't you think they all say that? I could call the police for this; I...out!"

Dimitri had also just been reminded of why he never came swimming at the public pools. The sea was so much more appetising. He'd have to take Rosie there; where they wouldn't get accused of...of something unbelievably unjust.

He shook his head, moved towards the steps. On either side in the pool now, people were approaching him. Rosie to the left, Erin to the right. Rosie looked confused as she stopped beside them, "Dimmy?"

"Taking advantage," the lifeguard muttered.

Erin was struggling; she'd covered perhaps half the distance Rosie had in double the time, and turned a funny shade of scarlet with the effort. He wanted to swim across and help. Something in her expression told him that would be a bad idea.

"Dimmy, I want a ride again," she fluttered her eyelashes in an innocent kind of way, the way children were before they understood the world, "Please?"

Erin was throwing up more of a splash than the children throwing themselves into the water from the diving board. She'd disappear for a moment underwater, then pop up spluttering. Her hair was plastered to her cheeks, the remaining traces of mascara streaked down her face. She could've been crying, for all he knew.

She was doing it, though. He was proud of her.

"What the hell..." she had no breath left by the time she reached him, "You came because...I can't believe..."

"Erin," he blinked at the several seamless changes in sentence, "She's fine."

"What did you...what did you do to her?"

"Nothing," he felt angry now. She didn't trust him. They worked together, in life-and-death situations, risking everything for each other, and she didn't trust him. He raised a hand to the steps and a foot to the first uneven jut in the wall.

"She's four!"

"I _know_ she's four."

Rosie turned to her mother now, still by Dimitri's side, "Mummy?"

"Come on, Rosie. We're going."

"But Mummy, Dimmy's giving me a ride again!"

"Oh, yes, he is. He's giving us all a ride," she gave him a look fuelled with fury and held out her hand to Rosie. The child knew where her loyalties had to lie. She followed reluctantly, but Erin could barely stay afloat, never mind swim away from Dimitri.

"Here, miss," one of the spectators called timidly from his deckchair on the side of the pool, "She looked like she was in trouble. He was only helping the wee bairn."

"I..." Erin gulped, utterly tipped over the edge now. She sank down below the surface of the water again. Dimitri jumped down from the steps and reached her in a split-second, taking her arm and holding her above the blueness.

She coughed and spluttered in his grip, "I...Dimitri..."

"You're okay," he held out his hand for a bewildered Rosie, too, and she took it, "You're okay now, hey. It's alright."

"_Inappropriate__contact_ between_two__persons_ in the_pool_!" the lifeguard screeched.

Dimitri smirked. He lifted Rosie up onto the side, clambered out himself and then took Erin's hand. She was shaking, really shaking. He helped her up, and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She clung to him. He could be sure she was sobbing now.

XxXxX

Rosie sucked a mouthful of juice up through the straw, ripped a chunk from her muffin and smiled at Dimitri.

He smiled back, "Had a good time, sweetie?"

"Yeah."

They sat in silence for a while. He had a muffin in front of him too, and a mug of coffee, but he didn't really feel like either at the moment. He wrapped his hands around the mug and felt warmth trickle through him.

Erin materialised eventually. She'd dried her hair, but it fell in clumps of dampness, with a slight red mark on her forehead where she'd held the heat for too long. She hadn't bothered with makeup. Her eyes were brighter than ever.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

Rosie swallowed another mouthful of muffin, "Can we come swimming again?"

"Maybe we'll go to the zoo next time," Dimitri suggested weakly. Erin didn't even smile. She sank down into the seat opposite him, wrapping her hands around her own mug. She looked like she needed it. She was still trembling.

"Mummy?"

"Rosie, sweetie, why don't you go and put this in the man's pot over there," Dimitri fished a couple of coins from his pocket and indicated a charity campaigner by the door, "Go on, I'll watch you."

Rosie slid down from her chair, lips still smudged with chocolate, and ran off clutching the coins proudly to her chest.

"Erin..." he held out a hand to her, but didn't make contact – it was like he was asking her permission.

"I'm sorry."

"You've nothing to be sorry for."

She gave him a withering glare, only it ended out as a tearful grimace all of a sudden, "I'm sorry I doubted you."

"Do you doubt me at work?"

"No."

"I doubt you, sometimes," he met her gaze, saw her eyes widen a little, "You have to doubt sometimes, so you can be proven wrong."

Erin didn't speak.

"I understand you're really protective of Rosie, and I think you have every reason to be. But you have to believe that I would never do anything like that."

"I do. I know that."

He nodded, "That's okay, then."

Erin stared down at the coffee in front of her. A couple of undissolved particles floated unappetisingly along the surface of the drink. She glanced to Dimitri's, saw that his was the same, and that he too had no intention of attempting to consume it.

"We're spoilt at work, with the drinks machine, you know," Dimitri smirked. His hovering hand slipped down and brushed her arm, just lightly. Fireworks flew up his spine. "Should we just go home?"

"Yeah."

"To mine?"

"Are you sure?"

Dimitri looked at her. She was pale, tearful, tired. "You're not going to argue with me, are you? Not going to doubt me today? We'll go back to yours, get some stuff, head to mine – I'll sleep on the sofa, you girls can have the bed. We'll watch a movie or something, and order in some pizzas. And tomorrow, we can feed the ducks."

"Pizza and ducks?"

He smiled as Rosie reappeared beside him. She held out her arms, and he stood up and scooped her up. Erin stood too, picking up the bags and setting off to the car park, "Thanks, Dee."

"Any time," he paused, letting Rosie play with his still-damp hair, "Except the pizza. That'll have to be a one-off. It's not good for my image."

XxXxX


	4. Penguin

**Back from holidays now ~ thanks for the reviews, here's the next chapter :)**

Chapter 4, Penguin:

"There we go," Dimitri laid Rosie down on the bed and wrapped her up in covers gently, making sure the pink blanket was tucked all around. She yawned. He leant down, brushed her hair aside and kissed her on the forehead. "Night, Rosie. Sweet dreams."

Her eyes were closed before he reached the door. But Erin emerged from the bathroom, "Dee?"

"Are you okay now?" he crossed the floor back towards her. Her frilly teddy-bear pyjamas framed her figure. She looked small, young and fragile. "Come here."

They hugged, briefly. He just held her, not taking advantage. She snuggled up to him, the remains of her perfume drifting towards his nose – she smelled warm and sweet.

"I'll be better in the morning," she pulled apart eventually, reluctant, "Are you sure you're okay on the sofa? I can't begin to thank you for..."

"I'm fine. Ex-SBS, remember? Ruth always said I fought sharks for fun – a sofa's a luxury. And you're welcome."

She nodded. Sat down on the bed. Slipped under the covers, her eyes already fluttering shut. He paused, then leant down and kissed her forehead too. She looked too tired to be embarrassed, but still a small smile crept across her lips. "Night, Dee."

"Goodnight."

He flicked off the light, walked back across to the door. Watched Erin shuffle down in the bed, and settle with her knees curled up against her chest. Closed the door, and left her to sleep.

Funnily enough, he didn't feel tired now. He crept downstairs and turned on the TV. The news; the Home Secretary was talking about protecting the nation. Oh, and a clip about a penguin escaping from a zoo. Such fun.

He picked up his phone and texted Calum. Calum never seemed to sleep. Tariq had once said 'I'm like a shark, I never sleep.' Why did sharks always seem to apply to MI5 officers? Thinking of Tariq made his heart pound.

They all missed him. Of course they did. But it couldn't be talked about any more. That happened every time; every death. They picked themselves up, dusted off the memories.

**Good****day?**

It didn't take Calum long to reply. _What__do__u__think?__Where__did__you__disappear__2__anyway?__Covered__4__ya._

**Cheers.****&****swimming.**

_Swimming?_

**With****Erin****and****her****daughter.**

_Ooooh good on ya m8 xD._

Dimitri wrinkled his nose and dropped his phone to the table. He could just imagine Calum laughing at that idea. They'd get some stick on Monday morning.

He switched off the lamp beside him, zipped up his sleeping bag and fell into a dream.

William Towers becoming a penguin.

XxXxX

Dimitri shot up. Shudders ran up and down his spine, a cold sweat lingering on his collar bones. He wasn't sure why.

First he thought it had been his dream. Anyone would agree that Towers was scary enough without the suggestion of a reincarnation into a waddling bird thing.

Then he decided it must've been his phone, or the doorbell – sometimes, he awoke at sounds like that, all prepared to grab his gun and protect himself. Past experiences changed people. They shaped who you were for the rest of your lives.

But then he heard it again. Sobbing. Soft, pitiful sobbing. He wriggled out of the sleeping bag and flicked on the light, stretching his aching back. He stood up, crept up the stairs and peeped his head around his bedroom door.

Erin was huddled up on the carpet, slumped against the bed. Head in hands, elbows on knees. Crying as if her head was splintering.

He didn't want to approach her at first. He felt as if he shouldn't be there, as if he was intruding on her privacy. He wanted to run across and hug her, and simultaneously to jog in the opposite direction.

He watched her phone ring, on the bedside table. Watched her snatch it up, desperately sniffing. He could just read the screen; _Mum_.

"Hi, Mum."

Dimitri had to give it to her; she was good. If you hadn't been in the room with her, you'd never have guessed she was upset. Evidently, though, her mum knew better. Didn't mums always?

"I'm fine, Mum, honestly. No, no. Rosie's asleep – she had a busy day. No, Mum, I'm just tired. You know I have trouble sleeping sometimes."

Dimitri sighed. He was willing to bet that Erin's mother wanted to hug her too, now.

"He's been wonderful. He's so good with Rosie; she loves him. He's sleeping downstairs on the sofa, he's just so sweet, Mum. I think..."

Silence. Dimitri was glad she hadn't finished that sentence. He'd probably have given himself away. God, did she really feel that way? She'd always played around with him at work; teased him. He'd thought she wasn't interested. And even now, it had just seemed like she needed the comfort, not the love. But...

"I know, Mum. I know. I am being careful. You know I'd always put Rosie first. But Mum, you don't know him. You didn't like Thomas much – that was stupid of me, I was blinded, and desperate, and so young. But now's different. I can feel it. He keeps me feeling alive."

Dimitri literally had to clasp a hand over his mouth to stifle the gasp. Nobody had ever said anything like that about him before. But he'd never felt the way he did around his boss. What went around, came around.

"Yeah, you should have a lie-in, then. Watch the news. Yeah, you too. I'll tell Rosie. And yeah, I'll ring you tomorrow. Love you, Mum. Bye."

Her voice broke over the last couple of words. She dropped the phone and ran fingers across her cheeks, smearing tears everywhere. She ran those same hands through her hair, untangling the mass of chocolaty curls. Still her eyes glittered, with tears, and with other emotion.

She managed to stand up, and sit back down on the edge of the bed. Rosie was tucked up neatly, her chest rising and falling so very gently. Maybe she was dreaming, too. Maybe she was swimming with dolphins, in her subconscious.

Erin reached out to stroke her daughter's hair, but her hand paused in mid-air. She didn't want to wake her. She wanted to watch her sleep forever. And also to hold her, and never let her go. Her hand fell back down to her side as another sob escaped her lips. A hollow, heart-wrenching sob.

She turned away again, as if she didn't want Rosie to hear. As if she wanted to protect her, for as long as was possible in this world. This cruel, cruel world. She gulped back the new tears. Seemed to almost regain a little composure. Lifted the corner of the bed sheet, as if to climb back in.

And then she saw Dimitri.

XxXxX


	5. Your Trouble

**So as some might know, I managed to type up an entire chapter and then lose everything... I really wasn't happy, but anyway here's chapter five!**

**Thanks again for the reviews so far – they mean a lot to me :)**

"You...how long? How long have you been there?" she didn't do such a good job of hiding her tears this time. Maybe she didn't see the point. He knew anyway, didn't he?

"Not long."

She nodded. He'd say that whether it had been five seconds, or five minutes. Whether he'd only seen her sniff back what could have been a cold, or her heard the entire conversation with her mother.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to shock you."

"It's fine," she didn't know why she said that. It wasn't.

"Can I..." he didn't finish the question; instead, he crept across the room and sank down onto the mattress beside her. This was the side he never slept on; the side where the springs weren't stretched, and the sheets not wrinkled. "Did you have a bad dream?"

She nodded again.

"So did I," he attempted to put her at ease as he watched her shoulders grow tenser and tenser, her eyes more cold, "About the Home Secretary, actually. He turned into a penguin."

She snorted, "How does your mind work?"

"Oh, I don't know. I'm a messed-up kind of guy."

"You can say that again."

She had seemed to relax, actually. They sat quietly for a few moments, listening to the beating of each other's hearts. Erin's was slightly faster; a little easier to detect.

"Mine was about you. You, and Rosie. You were...you were on a boat. I was there too, but I was locked in a compartment, because the captain had lost the keys. And I could see you, leaning further over the edge, showing Rosie the waves crashing up against the side. And she was laughing, and you were hugging her. I was knocking on the glass, but you couldn't hear me. Nobody ever heard me."

Dimitri played with the tassels on her shorts uncomfortably. He'd suddenly realised how close they were sitting. His leg brushed against hers, their fingers centimetres apart where they lay at their respective sides.

"And you just kept hanging further and further, and I knew what was going to happen, and I was screaming at you to stop it, but... you fell in. And Rosie was just standing there on her own, crying, trying to reach her arms out towards you, and you were struggling in the water. And I just couldn't get out."

"Then you woke up?"

She didn't reply to that, "You stopped struggling, after a while. Rosie stopped crying. Everything was still, and silent, and empty. Except for the screams in my head. They were deafening."

"It's okay," he clenched his fists up, resisting the urge to reach out and hold her, "It's over now. It's not real."

"It is, though," she sniffed, her words a hoarse whisper, "I try to reach out, but I can't even quite get there. I try to show how I feel, but it never really works."

Dimitri bit his lip, "I did hear some of that, with your mum. And I...I didn't realise... I like you, Erin. I've always liked you, since we first met. You're not like some of them, you're not a monster. You hold that gun in your hands, and you do what you've got to do, but you don't enjoy it. You cry for the fallen; you cry for the victims in all of this. And that's a beautiful thing."

"You're a beautiful thing, too," Erin replied, then flushed as she realised what it'd come out as, "The things...the things you stand for. I mean...you know what I mean, don't you?"

"Not really, but I'll use my imagination," Dimitri chuckled.

They both turned towards Rosie, in a protective way, as though proud parents checking up on her. She was so peaceful, in her sleep. So innocent.

"What I said about Rosie. I meant that, too. She really adores you."

"That's reciprocated."

Erin smiled, then frowned, "You...you heard about Thomas, then?"

"Yeah. I'm sorry."

"No, no. It's just...he hurt me. He made me fear love – made me wonder if I'd ever want that kind of relationship ever again. But I do. I do."

Dimitri felt himself grow uncomfortable. He felt as if he were taking advantage of her, somehow. She was weak. She didn't know what she was saying. "Hey, it's a bit late for such deep conversation, isn't it? How about you go to bed, and we'll talk tomorrow?"

"I'm tired, Dee. Not ill. I know what I want."

"I know you do. But I don't like this – I don't like to feel as if I'm doing something with you that you might regret when you've had some coffee and thought about things a little."

She sighed. Shook her head. Smiled. "You're too nice, Levendis. That's your trouble. You're just too bloody nice."

Her using his surname made him feel slightly more comfortable, as if she understood his unease, and was trying to make a joke. But he also wondered if she was bitter. If she felt as though he'd betrayed her.

Her head was lolling sideways, her eyes flickering shut again. She looked exhausted. "What time is it?"

"Ten to six."

"It'll be light soon."

"Yep."

Erin yawned, "Rosie wakes up about seven, normally. She likes to watch the world wake up; she sits in the window with her peanut butter on toast waving to the buses as they pass. She wonders why the drivers don't wave back, sometimes."

"You need to get some sleep. I'll sort out her breakfast, when she gets up, and we'll do something until you're ready – then we'll go out for a stroll. And talk," Dimitri promised, taking the bed covers and lifting it up for her.

She obliged, and curled up underneath, but reached out a hand, "Please, Dee. Stay. Just for a while."

"Okay," he agreed, not wanting her to panic any more than she already had been, "Okay, I'll sit with you. You're fine. I'm here."

Her hand connected with his bare leg. She tugged, ever so gently, as his hand moved down to take hers, and he leant further over her, his shadow protective. She smiled, her eyes closed now. Whispered her appreciation, so overwhelmingly gratefully. "Thank you."

He didn't reply to that. He didn't have to. She knew.

XxXxX

**If anyone's interested, I'm probably putting up my alternative ending for 10.6 today, and I would appreciate it if you'd tell me what you think. It'll be called _Where the Sun Sparkles_... xx**


	6. Mr Whippy's Finest

"What flavour is it?"

Erin turned at the sound of Dimitri's voice. Smiled. Managed to look truly happy, for the first time in just a while. Managed to make him truly happy, just with that smile. "What flavour's what?"

"The lip gloss."

"Cherry," her grin widened as she finished applying a streak of pink across her lips in the mirror, "Supposedly. Tastes more plastic-based, though, if I'm honest."

"Oh."

"Oh?"

Dimitri chuckled now, "Cheeky, trying to put me off..."

Erin looked a little bewildered. Dimitri winced, wondering if he'd gone too far. She was damaged goods; she needed time. She just changed the subject nervously, "Where's Rosie?"

"Watching TV in the lounge."

"Has she had her breakfast?"

He nodded, worried by her sudden briskness. It was as if she'd locked herself away from him again, like she did at work. She seemed to think it was less painful. "We were going to go for a walk to the park; we were just waiting for you."

"I'm a bit tired."

"So am I."

She flushed, her cheeks becoming a deeper pink, yet the rest of her face staying ghostly pale, so she looked almost ill, "I'm sorry, about last night. About everything."

"It's fine, Erin. I wanted to help you – I still do. Anytime you need anything, you know you only have to ask, don't you?"

Erin nodded, not looking overly convinced, "Thank you. But I really think I've outstayed my welcome now. You've got much better things to do than listen to me moping."

"I thought you'd gathered I didn't have a social life?" Dimitri tried to make light of the situation again, but she didn't even attempt to smile. He sighed. "Erin, look at me. I'm not going to let you go home and build up even more that you blame yourself for. If you don't want to come for a walk, that's fine; tell me to get lost."

"I didn't mean that..."

"But Rosie wants to go, and she wants you to come too. You spend so much time worrying, feeling guilty for the things you've inflicted on her. And she doesn't blame you for any of it, because you're her mum, Erin, and she loves you – that's all she wants in return; love. You give her that, and there is nothing else for you to feel bad about, so don't. It hurts her when she sees you're upset. And it hurts me too."

"Dee..."

"If you want to come, we'll be going once Peppa Pig's finished," Dimitri turned away, ignoring her interruption again, "Help yourself to something from the fridge, although I doubt you'll find anything particularly appetising. And whatever you do, don't smudge your lip gloss."

He left the room and half-slammed the door behind him, leaving Erin staring towards the wood, totally confused.

XxXxX

"Swingy? Please?" Rosie glanced from Erin to Dimitri. She skipped along between them, bridging the gap as they avoided meeting each other's gaze. Without her, they'd probably have walked at opposite ends of the park.

"Okay," Dimitri nodded, taking one hand. Erin took the other silently. They swung her backwards and forwards, listening to her squeal. Even locked away in their own thoughts, they both smiled at how happy she seemed to be.

"Can we have ice cream? Please?"

Erin seemed thankful for this further aversion, dropping her daughter's hand and fumbling around in her bag, "I'll get them. What do you want, Dimitri?"

"You don't need to..."

"Cornetto? Magnum?" she pressed.

Rosie still clung to Dimitri's hand, "He wants a surprise."

"Okay," Erin shrugged, her eyes focussed on finding the money in her purse as she walked away.

Dimitri pulled Rosie onto his knee as he sat down on the bench. He wondered if Erin felt jealous, somehow; threatened by Rosie befriending him. It was stupid, yes, but they'd only had each other for all these years, and suddenly Rosie wanted to spend time with Dimitri as well. Maybe that was what was making her seem so far away.

"Dimmy?"

"Sorry, I was just thinking."

"Mummy does thinking a lot. She says she's listening, but she's thinking really."

Dimitri held her closer. She didn't sound angry about this, but upset and confused. "How is your mummy, Rosie? Do you think she's okay?"

Rosie was silent for a long moment, "Can we feed the duckies after the ice cream?"

He nodded, aware he'd taken a leap asking her such a question when she already seemed fragile around the subject. She was just a little girl. All she knew was that her mum was distracted, not why or how. "Of course we can."

Erin reappeared, and sat down at the opposite end of the bench, handing Rosie a strawberry mini-milk and Dimitri a whippy cone. He noted the flake. They always cost extra, didn't they? "Here you go."

"Thanks," they both echoed. Dimitri smiled again as Rosie tucked straight into hers, but Erin had turned away to look out across the park. "Aren't you having one? You didn't have breakfast either, did you? You must be starving."

"She doesn't have breakfast," Rosie replied before her mother could. Seeing the looks she got, she frowned, "Sometimes."

"That's not good, is it?" Dimitri asked softly.

Erin sighed. He couldn't tell if she was joking, or really irritated. "Enough of the teaming up against me, okay?"

Dimitri gave the ice cream another lick. It was cold against his tongue; cold and refreshing. He held it out in front of her, "Here, have some."

"I'm fine."

"I don't have anything. Or at least nothing infectious," he smirked, bringing the ice cream up to her lips, "Please. It'll make me feel less naughty?"

"What about the lip gloss?"

"Good riddance, I say, if it tastes like plastic. Although it does look beautiful. Then again, always look beautiful."

Erin couldn't hold back her smile. She glanced down at Rosie, who had melted ice cream all over her mouth, and was busy trying to reach a dot of strawberry on her nose with her tongue. "Thanks. I think."

"To clear up any confusion, it doesn't matter about the lip gloss," Dimitri returned the smile. Their eyes met, and something passed between them again.

Erin reached up to take the ice cream from him, but his hand lingered on the cone, and their fingers connected. She licked the ice cream, not trying to disconnect their touch. "Nice ice cream."

"Mr Whippy's finest."

"That explains it."

Dimitri grinned, taking it back and sneaking in another lick before she leant over and stole it again, "There's a problem, though, isn't there?"

"I wasn't aware of one. Going to enlighten me?"

"Oh, Erin, get your priorities sorted. The flake – who's going to eat the flake?"

Erin, mouth half-full with ice cream, swallowed to reply as Dimitri chuckled playfully, put before either of them could move Rosie reached up and grabbed the chocolate with her already sticky fingers, "I am."

Dimitri was too busy laughing at Erin's shocked expression to lecture Rosie on contaminating their treat, as well as the fact that she'd stolen the flake. He leant across and took a bite of the cone. "Fair enough. Should we feed the ducks now?"

XxXxX


	7. Those Real Heroes

_**Errrr...**_

She was a couple of steps behind him. He'd only dropped her hand to lift Rosie up, so she could see the spires on the church nearby. He'd reached for her again, but she was occupied with her phone. He'd turned back to discuss why churches had colourful windows with her daughter instead.

And so, when a gap had finally appeared in the traffic, he'd presumed without question that she was right behind them. Only when they'd begun to cross the road had he realised she wasn't.

"Erin!" he called.

She raised her head, tossing her fringe back from her face, and he'd caught a look of pain engraved on her lips before she shook herself and took a step out. What did the text say? What had she read to wipe her previous smile so clearly away?

When she moved, the road was empty, and the only sound was the breeze rustling the autumn leaves. Within seconds, a car flew around the corner, throwing up pools of dirty water. The driver was throwing it around wildly; the wheels twisted and turned as they tried to grip the tarmac.

Dimitri instinctively dragged Rosie the rest of the way across the road, one hand clutching her hand and the other guiding her by the shoulder. Erin, though, was stuck in the centre of the road, like a rabbit caught in the headlights. In one direction, the out-of-control Peugeot was approaching, and in the other two more cars.

With each millisecond that passed, Dimitri knew that she wouldn't make it back either way. Time wasn't frozen for him, just moving incredibly slowly, making it more painful as his brain tried to figure out what he could do to help.

"Rosie, look at the dog over there," he indicated a chocolate Labrador puppy bounding along behind them. The girl turned to watch it.

Dimitri's eyes were fixed on Erin, though. She was a practical kind of girl; she was head of Section D, for God's sake, and brilliant at it. She was made for this kind of thing. Wasn't she?

He watched, his heart pounding, as she didn't move. Didn't hold her hands up, didn't attempt to duck out of the way. Just stood there. A gasp escaped his lips, "Erin, get out of the bloody road! Erin, _now_!"

Rosie turned back, frightened by the tone of his voice, and the emphasis on his words. She saw her mother, saw the cars flying towards her. Stopped still and stared.

Dimitri flung himself in front of her and pulled her into his chest just as the cars reached the central point. He saw everything, and she saw nothing. They both heard it all, though.

There was a tremendous crash as the Peugeot collided with the first one coming in the other direction, which was thrown from the road and up against a lamppost on the curb. The second had found time to break, and was only tapped out of the way. The Peugeot disappeared around the corner, swerving wildly.

Rosie screamed, the sound muffled by Dimitri's jacket. He smoothed her hair down, unable to speak, as his eyes scanned the wreckages in the road for life. Burning rubber smells filled the air. Plumes of smoke rose from the first car's bonnet.

It was the most Dimitri could do not to cry for a moment. Erin. He couldn't describe what she'd meant to him. What he'd found since their first meet. And he'd never told her – never really told her how he felt. All she'd heard were the jokes. Now... now she was...

He closed his eyes. Took a deep breath. Crouched down at Rosie's height. "Rosie, sweetie, everyone's fine; everyone's going to be okay now. Listen to me, angel – don't cry. It's okay."

"I want my...I want my mummy," Rosie sobbed.

"I know. I'll find her. She's going to be fine," he hugged her hard, one last time.

Several people had rushed out from houses by now, and an elderly couple saw Dimitri and came towards him, their eyes wide with shock. The man spoke first, "What...what happened?"

"I don't know," Dimitri replied, his voice ragged. If he had, he wouldn't have wanted to relate it in the middle of the street. "I'm a police officer, I can help them. It's going to be fine. Can you..."

The woman nodded wordlessly, her eyes locked on the smoke rising behind Dimitri. She reached out for Rosie's hand, but Rosie clung to Dimitri, her heartbeat racing against him. He sighed, "Rosie, these people are going to look after you. It's going to be fine – I'll be back before you know it, okay?"

He left before she could beg him again, before he might change his mind. He'd have to deal with Rosie later; she was going to be absolutely hysterical, he knew. But he had more important things to do now.

The man walking his dog had stopped too, and handed the lead to another neighbour peering their head out from around a door. He and Dimitri met as they ran towards the road. "What the hell..."

"I know," Dimitri shook his head quickly, "We need to get everyone out of the cars, the Golf first; it doesn't look stable. Take everyone to the sides of the road, get them as far away as possible if they're uninjured."

The man nodded and ran across to the smoking car. Brave man, Dimitri decided. It wasn't his duty, this. He was choosing to help. Around him, there were a couple of strangers stumbling confusedly across the road, some from other cars, some passers-by.

He raised his voice and called out to no-one in particular, "Can someone get the emergency services please, now! We're going to need all three, quickly! We need the nearest houses evacuated straight away, and the roads blocked off!"

In an emergency, people followed orders. They did what they were told, because they didn't know what else to do. It didn't matter what they were like normally. It was now that you found out who the real heroes were; the ones, like that man, who knew what they had to do, and did it without question. Dimitri had to do that now.

He saw that the couple from the second car were scrambling out. The woman was crying, but they seemed pretty much unharmed. Thank God.

He ran across to the Golf. Two in the front, two in the back; a full car. The airbags had protected the driver; he was being helped out by the dog walker. The woman beside him, though, was evidently unconscious; her head lolled against the seat, blood trickling down her face.

Two children, in the back. One boy, one girl. The girl was perhaps eight or nine, and screaming hysterically. The boy...the boy was Rosie's age. His face so disfigured only his eyes were visibly. Glassy; frozen open. Dead.

XxXxX


	8. Drawing Courage

Water flew across the street, fired from the hose on the scarlett fire engine parked across both lanes of the road. Two ambulances were opposite, the paramedics fiddling with stretchers and medical bags. Police were cordoning off the road, talking to witnesses, watching in horror.

There was noise everywhere. Talking, and splashing, and screaming, and crashing. The Golf was now a blackened out skeleton. Dimitri had carried the girl from the Golf hastily, but she'd pounded at his arms, screamed in his ears. She'd already seen her brother dead, already seen her mother going the same way. What was her life going to be like now? How could she ever get over this? She was just a child.

He'd handed her over to the paramedics and walked back across to her mum. Her brother had been dragged from the wreckage and a crowd of people were gathered around him, but their efforts were always going to be futile. At a glance, his head flopped sideways and a trickle of blood ran out from his lips. His neck was broken. There'd been no chance.

Another woman sat in the car beside the mother. Dimitri eyed her for a moment, as if unwilling to trust his eyes, then ran around and flung his arms around her. "Erin!"

"Dimitri," she gave him a cold shove away.

He didn't care. She was alive. "What the hell happened? I saw you, then you just… Are you alright? You need to get your head seen to; come on, I'll get…"

"I'm fine. I need to stay with Kate," Erin indicated the woman beside her, who was now conscious, softly sobbing. A paramedic was talking to her through the window beside her, and two firemen were hovering a little behind. "They can't open the door; they can't move her. They've got to cut the roof out."

"Well, that's okay. They're the experts; they know what's best."

She ignored the gentle coaxing in Dimitri's voice, not turning to face him as she asked about her daughter, "Where's Rosie? Did she…did she see…"

"No, no. She didn't see anything. She'll be okay – she's with a neighbour across the street at the moment. Once you've been checked over we can go and find her."

"She won't want me, she'll want you. All she's talked about for weeks is you. When's Dimitri coming round? Can we go to Dimitri's?" she imitated the girl's sweetness well, but there was evident spite in her tone, "All I do is lie to her anyway, remember?"

"Erin, she was screaming for you," Dimitri sighed. So she was upset about the attention he attracted from Rosie. "Once this is over, I'll stop coming. I never have to see her again. Or you, if that's what you want. But at the moment, she just needs to know that everything's okay. She needs both of us for that."

"That's not what I want," she whispered. He frowned, and she raised her head and held out a shaking hand, "I don't want you to go. Please stay. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, I'm just…"

He wrapped his arms around her all over again, "I know. I know."

"Rosie loves you. And I…I love you too," Erin managed to confess, before she buried her head in his chest.

At times like this, you either brought up the cold and detached defence, or fell into the shock and pain of what you'd just experienced. Denied it, or succumbed.

He rocked her, "You're okay."

Kate moaned on the other side of the car. Erin untangled herself from Dimitri's hold, and turned the opposite direction, "You're going to be fine, Kate. Listen to me, your husband's not injured, and your daughter's okay too; she's over there talking to the paramedics."

"Freddie?"

Erin's gulp was audible, "I'm so sorry."

The woman didn't seem to be able to summon up any energy for a reaction. She just closed her eyes. That was worse than any screaming or sobbing she could've done. Silence meant she was giving up.

"Here, miss, you're fine," one of the firemen called from the window, peering in behind the paramedic still fiddling with a needle in her arm, "We're going to have to cut you out, but we're being as gentle as we can; just shout if it hurts, yeah?"

The paramedic laughed, "Meanwhile, you have the pleasure of all these men rescuing you – that's got to be good."

She didn't even react.

"Can you tell us what hurts, Kate?"

"Nothing."

The paramedic shot Erin a glance. Dimitri, seeing his colleague's current inability to comfort any longer, took a step forward. "Kate, sweetie, think of your daughter. How old is she – eight, maybe? What's her name?"

"Imogen. Immy. She's nine."

"Well, think of Immy. She's just a little girl, isn't she? She doesn't know what's going on – she just knows she's scared. She's already lost her brother. She can't lose you as well."

Kate didn't speak, but her eyes flickered open, and she met Dimitri's gaze. Around them, sirens rang out and chatter echoed through the street, but the car seemed quiet.

Dimitri continued, ever so softly, "So hold on for her, even if you can't for yourself."

"I've got a daughter, Kate," Erin drew courage from Dimitri. Again. She drew so much courage from Dimitri, and so many other things, too. "Rosie. Even when things are hard, I do my best, for her. You can do that now, for Immy, for your husband… For your son."

"Thank you," Kate whispered, "Thank you for staying with me."

Erin reached out, touched her fingers. Kate couldn't turn her head, couldn't lift her arms. But a tear trickled down her cheek, and that was enough. Enough to show that she hadn't given up – she was broken, but she was fighting. That was all anybody could hope for her at the moment.

XxXxX


	9. Right Mind

**Just found this, not sure it's a very apt ending but I don't think I have the heart to add any more, maybe one day. Thanks to anyone who read this, it's really appreciated xxx**

Dimitri's eyes, watching over Erin in both protection and admiration, wavered to the bonnet as a spark flew by him. Part of the metalwork was throwing up fire again, spreading out smoke. The fire officers were aiming their hoses at it, but the sparks were spreading, and Dimitri say eyes widen collectively behind helmets as they headed towards the petrol tank.

Kate hadn't noticed. The paramedic hadn't either. And Erin was oblivious, still mumbling reassurances. But Dimitri knew; he'd seen enough of these, in his time. Enough accidents ending in tragedy. He knew what happened next.

"Erin…" he grabbed her arm, and she spun around, confused. Frightened by the unusual panic in his voice, and the sudden strength in his hold. "Erin, come on."

"Dee, I'll get checked over once Kate's sorted, but I'm fine, I promise you." her eyes were pleading; pleading with him to let her complete what she'd started. She had to prove something to herself, and to everyone else. "Rosie'll be okay, won't she? She's used to it. She always gets pushed aside for something."

Dimitri was shocked by the pain in her voice. He really didn't want children, if this was how it turned out in their profession. Constantly frightened of losing them, or of pushing them aside.

Erin said it was possible to have both a family and a successful career at MI5, but she'd also confided that that was what she had to believe. She had to get through life somehow, by convincing herself that. It was unbearable otherwise.

The sparks flew higher, and a couple of the firemen retreated, shouting things across the street in clearly agitated voices. Flames licked unbearably near, firing out heat. Dimitri took a deep breath and yanked Erin's arm, dragging her out of the car and throwing her down onto the floor.

"Move!" he screamed to the paramedic, diving down by Erin's side. She was sobbing, maybe because she was so scared and so bewildered, or maybe because he'd just broken her arm.

The whole time felt like so long, but, as he lay in the mud gasping, it was perhaps half a minute since he'd first noticed the sparks. Things slowed down when you were in these positions, fearing for your life. Or fearing for others' lives.

"Dee…" Erin managed through her tears, "Wh…what…"

He gulped. The last thing he'd seen as he'd thrown himself down to the floor was Rosie. Her nose pressed up against the window across the street, her eyes wide with fear. He knew what she was going to see now. And there was nothing he could do about it.

He threw an instinctive arm over Erin's head as the first scream hit his ears, whispering into the earth, "It's okay. It's over now."

And then the world rocked, and he fell still.

XxXxX

"I thought I'd lost you."

Erin, propped up amidst fluffy pillows, forced her eyes open, and her lips into the smallest of smiles, "That would've been careless."

He sank down beside her. Her voice was so soft, so weak. Yet so gorgeous. "I'm sorry about your arm."

"I won't hold it against you," she assured him, half humouring, "Dee… You saved my life."

"No, it was j…"

"You did. You saved me," she sounded suddenly strong, as if needing to get across her point, "Without you, Rosie would be an orphan now."

"Erin."

"The text, in the road. The one that… It was Thomas. Telling me he had to see Rosie. Three thirty, he said. Outside the National Gallery."

He nodded, probing carefully, "You were surprised?"

She mirrored his nod. Winced. "I don't want to talk about him. Not that I don't trust you. I do. But… he hurt me; that's all there is to it. It's in the past now. Or at least I thought it was. That's the point."

Dimitri decided to avoid pressing her for information, at least until she was calmer, "Me and Rosie walked back down to the park yesterday, fed the ducks again. She wanted me to carry her across the road."

"She saw…"

"She's fine, Erin. She saw the explosion, yes. She keeps asking if those people from the car are okay. But she's okay – she knows you're okay."

"When can I see her?"

"She keeps asking for you. The doctors think she'll be able to come in a couple of days; they just don't want to scare her. Hospitals are rather daunting, if kids aren't used to them, and she's only little, isn't she?"

Erin nodded, slowly. Dimitri took her uninjured hand and squeezed her fingers against his. They sat in silence for a while, listening to the buzz of the machines around them. Erin shivered in her flimsy hospital gown, and Dimitri wrapped the covers a little tighter around her. They didn't really need to talk. They both understood what the other needed.

"You're looking after her, though?"

"I see her every day. But she's with your parents," Dimitri smiled, "Enjoying countless breakfasts in bed and repeat episodes of Bob the Builder, no doubt."

"She never liked Bob the Builder. Fireman Sam, though – she loves that. She's always loved the colour red; the fire engines, and the café," Erin sniffed. Her eyes tired, her smile weak. "Dee…"

"Yeah? Do you want a drink or something?"

"Thomas knows where I live. He knows how to find Rosie, and he knows how to find my parents. He's not a man who stops because I don't obey the first time."

Dimitri gave her a small smile, "I'll talk to Harry about it. But really, Erin, it'll be fine. From what I've seen, your father can hold his own anyway, can't he? And of course Rosie can. Something that runs in the family generations."

She nodded gratefully, "Will you come and see me, tomorrow?"

"Of course," Dimitri reached out to the bedside table and handed her a card from it. A teddy bear, with a bandage wrapped around its head, eating an oversized bar of chocolate.

She smiled, "Calum taking the piss again?"

"I think you'll find it's_Bob_ now," he opened the card for her.

A page of scrawled messages around 'GET WELL SOON!' Each name signed below the notes was one she didn't recognise, yet from the language she could tell which of her colleagues had written them. _Bob_'s simply read 'missing you loads, boss' with a scruffy kiss beneath it. Bless him.

"Dee, you know what I said about leaving?"

"Erin, you don't need to make any decisions now, you…"

She interrupted him, "No, it isn't that. I've realised… I've realised I was wrong. I was scared; I jumped to conclusions. But… but I love this job. I'd be wrong to give it up."

"Harry _will_be pleased. He was worrying rather at the thought of recruiting a new section head already. Thought, for some reason, that no one in their right mind would ever do it."

Erin grinned, and her eyes sparkled, "Whoever said I was in any kind of right mind?"

XxXxX


End file.
